Transition

It has been a pleasure journeying with you all on this blog. When I started this blog in 2008 I was a 23-year-old introducing you all into a transition into post-college adulthood. I have written quite a bit about Pittsburgh, God, Christianity, and simply being a twentysomething in the millennial generation.

Blogging peaked in 2011 as I finished graduate school and moved to Tacoma. It fizzled and all but ended in recent years as I've focused less on blogging and more on people (and tweeting, to be honest). My last post here was about turning 30 and this seems like the right time for a transition.

In short, I'm starting a new blog about living in Tacoma as someone born and raised in Pittsburgh. It's not anything profound; just a sort of ongoing memoir of one person's life experience in one place having been shaped in another. I will halt details here as a synopsis can be found in my first post on the new blog.

Find my new blogging home on Medium. Read the introduction and start following. I hope you enjoy my experiences in Tacoma as much as I do.

30

Last week I turned 30 years old. I must say that this week does not feel much different from last week, but that's because age really is just a number. It can influence who you are if you want, or it could not. 

As time progresses, our priorities change and so, therefore, do our actions. There is no stereotypical way to live once you turn a certain age, but there, instead, exist an evolution that comes with maturity (sometimes against our will!).

Here, I suppose, is a non-exhaustive list of things that are definitely different in my life as a result of getting older and, hopefully, wiser:

1. I place far more value on a good night's sleep.

I have needed more sleep than most people my entire life. From an early age I have demonstrated a particular crabby demeanor any time I have not had enough sleep. This never really changed, but from age 18 to about 27 I simply pushed through it and valued fun over sleep.

Around 27 I settled into my 40-hour 9-to-5 job and realized that life was significantly better when I got 7.5-9 hours of sleep a night. Late nights got earlier. Weekday shows in Seattle became less enticing. A 10pm curfew was less a chore and more a pleasure. This has far more to do with waking up for work by 7 every day than my escalating age, but those things tend to correlate.

2. I care about my career.

Upon completion of graduate school, I got into the specific area of career services in higher ed with some sort of mantra that for being in career services I was not particularly career-focused. I never wanted to be the guy that took his job too seriously or put hobbies on the back burner in favor work.

Nothing monumental happened to change this mindset. In short, I kept doing my job, learning more, and gradually realized that I enjoyed the work quite a bit. I have a subscription to Fast Company, follow The Economist and the Wall Street Journal on Twitter, and find a lot of my conversations heading in the direction of careers. This was a natural progression that also came with getting into the work and doing it 40 hours a week. If I didn't like it, I'd probably move on to something else.

3. I want to buy a house.

This is a fairly recent development that I would encourage you to take at face value. When I say I want to buy a house, I mean that as opposed to generally saying that in my life I do not want to buy a house, which has generally been my level of interest in the subject until this year.

My job is feeling good and stable enough to keep me around a few more years and buying a house is generally a sound investment. If you know me at all, you know that I love practical investments, so this should not come as a huge surprise. It's take a while to get over the cost of housing outside of Pittsburgh, but I am realizing now that owning a house comes with stability and a sense of home that I have not had since going off to college 12 years ago.

4. I look forward to marriage.

Anyone who knows me well knows that I've been dating a wonderful girl for 2 years. Anyone who knows me well knows that 2 years is approximately 1 year and 8 months longer than any prior relationship, so yes, we are talking about getting married.

The cool thing is that we have taken time to consider the good and challenging parts of marriage resulting in feeling even better about it. We know it will be great most of the time and challenging other times, but that it will still be good in the challenging times. 

More on this in the near future, I'm sure.

5. I have had a nutritious eating and exercise revival to a healthy degree.

When we were in college we ate pretty much whatever we wanted and I didn't gain a pound. I didn't drink until I was 21, so I'm sure that helped, but even once I started added alcohol to my diet the weight and my health never changed. Part of that was because we were young and walked everywhere at Pitt; part of it was because we also hauled up the hill to life weights or play basketball about 5 days a week.

Recently I have gotten back into a 2-3 times a week exercise regimen that I plan to add to with basketball, but my body is getting a bit too weathered to process my old diet. Quality organic meats and cheeses, fresh organic vegetables, and a low amount of carbs make up what appears to be the 2015 diet and I am on board with it. Not only that, I am going through another wave of generally getting interested in cooking and cooking well. 

Top Chef certainly helps; although I use about 40% of the ingredients they use on the show and have not heard of about 15% of them!

I could go on, but these things are standing out most. Before I move on from how I have seen change happen, I'd like to share a short list things I am happy to have accomplished by the time I turned 30 and can think of off the top of my head:

1. Recording an album, 2014

2. Traveling to other countries. Jamaica, 2003, and Ecuador, 2008.

3. Driving across the country by myself, 2011.

4. Moving across the country, 2011.

5. Staying 2500 miles from home for more than a year, 2011-Present.

6. Receiving accolades from my peers for my work, 2013ish-Present.

7. Being a near-original member of the Pittsburgh Curling Club, 2002.

8. Proving that I had the work ethic and guts to play high school football for a year, 2000.

9. Enjoying an entire stress-free summer of unemployment before starting my career, 2011.

10. Seeing the Pirates make the playoffs twice, 2013-2014.

11. Seeing a Pirates playoff game in PNC Park, 2013.

12. Seeing the Steelers win two Super Bowls, 2006 and 2009.

13. Seeing the Penguins win the Stanley Cup once, 2009, and sorta twice more, 1991 and 1992.

14. Finishing two degrees from Pitt, BA, 2007, MEd, 2011.

15. Living at the beach for a summer (Ocean City, NJ), 2007.

16. Seeing 7 different ballparks in different cities, Fenway Park, old Yankee Stadium, Citizens Bank Park, Safeco Field, Progressive Field (Jacobs Field), Three Rivers Stadium, PNC Park.

Reflections From Camp

This weekend I took a trip to the Washington Family Ranch Young Life camp in Antelope, OR, to visit friends with whom Aly worked as an intern several years ago. It was great to meet her friends, Cara and Adam, plus their two beautiful girls, Olive and Gillian, as well as to see a place that's had such an effect on her life. It reminded me quite a bit of my own experiences with Suncrest Camp in Rochester, PA, which is where I accepted Jesus for the first time and felt my life change completely, just like many others before and after.

Thinking about those teenagers who are experiencing Jesus for the first time this week got me thinking about a lot of things. Should I be working in ministry? How much does the work I do really matter? Should I be leading a Young Life group or something like it? Should I just pack up and move to the Ranch? How can I answer God's call for my life in my current job?

One of the thoughts I had this weekend is that it's tough to have full, meaningful interactions with people who have different beliefs than you do. From my perspective, Jesus Christ is the basis of everything in my life. I believe in His death and resurrection, which was the person of God coming to earth to wash away our sins and provide eternal life to His people. This belief provides perspective for everything I do, how I do my job, and what my priorities are.

Frankly, it's hard to work with people who do not have the same fundamental motivations as I do. I love my neighbors and do my job well because there's no way to work with people who have identical beliefs with me all the time, but I find that other people have different focuses or agendas that don't make sense to me. Building up students into future leaders or just future people is hard when I can't just share the gospel with them. Maybe I can, but I haven't chosen to on a regular basis.

When a student is getting discouraged about their job search, I want to tell them to pray. There is simply no better option than to put your life in the hands of God. This is not for the purpose of God creating some opportunity for them to get a better job, but rather for them to be calm and know that God has already provided all they need. As Tim Keller addresses in his "Meeting the Real Jesus" sermon, Jesus isn't going to help us get a job or be a better lawyer (or whatever). That's not the point. The point is that Jesus has saved us from death; a death that we all deserve fully. Whatever happens on top of that is icing.

This thought arose because I was thinking about how it can be easier to be a youth camp leader and talk about Jesus than it is in other circumstances. When a teenager chooses to be at a church camp, their heart is open to the gospel. This doesn't happen as obviously at work or anywhere else, for that matter. Teenagers are open to ideas, especially if you can get the "cool" kids into it. Adults tend to be wrapped up in their own logic and in providing for themselves, while teenagers know they are not fully responsible for their own destiny.

Keller points out in the aforementioned sermon that the "educated" people, of whom I tend to surround myself, basically tend to be interested in creating their own fortune and destiny. The middle- to upper-class like to take the teachings of Jesus, but leave behind the doctrine that dictates the power of God. Rarely does someone tell me that they are into the death and resurrection of Jesus, but not as much into the "love your neighbor" teaching. Take anyone from any background and they are likely to be totally on board with Jesus' teachings of loving your neighbor and doing good.

The poor, on the other hand, see the gospel as just that; Good News! This IS the gospel (Good News in Greek). The death and resurrection and washing away of sins and loving your neighbor is all a part of it.

Educated folks rely on themselves quite a bit. The idea of there being a God who is in control or who has already determined that your sins are forgiven and you can't do anything to make Him love you more or less is something that is hard to wrap your mind around.

The key word there being "mind"; it's faith, not intellect. Christianity requires faith. Relying completely on what I can experience with my five senses is not an option. We cannot wrap our minds around God; if we could, how powerful of a God would that be?

This is just one thought that seems generally unfinished. I hope to continue this conversation with many of you soon.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

March 18, 1993 was the greatest sick day of my life. It was the first time that being sick actually felt like a blessing. It was the day when my sports fandom went from "why watch SportsCenter every day?" to "why is there only ONE 24/7 sports network?". On March 18, 1993, I stayed home sick from school and watched my first NCAA basketball tournament.

The NCAA basketball tournament is a 68-team (formerly 64-team) single-elimination tournament of conference winners and the top teams in college basketball. Due to it's one-and-done nature, it is nerve-racking for all teams and fans. The tournament is unique because household names like Kentucky, Duke, and UCLA are matched up with teams they never play from smaller schools without basketball history like Santa Clara, Florida Gulf Coast, and George Mason. These small schools have little to lose, so they play without reservation while their top-seeded counterparts often play wary of what could happen if they lose.

I remember certain details of that first day, but not all. I can recall the blue quilt that my dad and I spread out on the brown shag family room floor and his first explanation that this tournament would be happening all day, all weekend. Why had no one told me about this before? All of my sports memories started around autumn 1992 with Sid Bream crossing home plate and ending the Pirates' competitive baseball for 20 years, so maybe it was natural that spring of 1993 would be my first exposure.

St. John's beat Texas Tech in that first game. Then, it just kept going, all day, culminating with me falling asleep while Pitt got run out of the gym by Utah, 86-65.

Why do I remember some of these things? Well, to start, most of my childhood memories have something to do with sports. I remember my first Pirates game, my first Steelers game (1993 NFL playoff loss vs Buffalo), and my first Penguins game (generally, 1993 Stanley Cup vs Chicago).

On top of that, the NCAA tournament has just become a part of my life in ways other things have not.

Over the years, I've had a few different plastic/rubber basketball hoops for the kitchen that was probably my favorite toy growing up. That 1992 tournament was played in my kitchen almost as much as in arenas around the country.

The 1993 tournament was the first bracket I picked, incorrectly predicting the first 16-seed (Navy) to beat a 1-seed (Missouri).

In junior high, my social studies teacher and basketball coach, Mr. Wellendorf, had a TV in his room that he'd tune to games.

Come high school, they may as well have not scheduled classes in the afternoon. Any teacher that had a TV tuned to games would be signing hall passes to students who wanted to watch instead of learn. During senior year, my day ended with a few class periods or study halls in the video production room, so I recall sitting there and watching games with my good friend, Brandon. I distinctly remember that tournament because the day it started, March 20, 2003, was also the first day of invasion in the Iraq War.

If it weren't for memories, things like this tournament would not stick. I could go on and on with these thoughts, as I haven't even gotten into college yet. I will simply say that there was nothing more exciting than going to a college like Pitt that was a consistent top contender in this tournament, despite constant underachievement. The things we enjoy most are associated with our favorite memories for a reason; we want to keep living those moments over and over again.

Losing Sight of the Good Stuff

To a certain extent, I've removed a lot of the fun from my life on purpose. I don't mean that to say that I don't have fun or don't have an enjoyable life, but I spend a lot of my time focusing on "productive" activities and what's an efficient or effective use of my time instead of simply enjoying whatever it is I'm doing. If something is not productive in some way, then it's a waste of time. That's been my frame of mind in my adult life and it's been slowly hurting me.

When I first moved to Tacoma, I was faced with a new realization that my adult life and "grown-up" job leaves me a lot less time than graduate school did. After work, I have 5 hours of usable time before I am in bed preparing for the next day. Compared to my previous 16 hours of usable time when I was in graduate school and not occupied by a set work schedule, this was a huge change of pace.

I find myself now wanting to spend the majority of my time being productive. This could mean either exercising, practicing music, or in a faith-development scenario. These are all good things, even great things, but they're not always fun. Forcing myself to practice or exercise takes it from the realm of being a fun activity to being a chore.

I'd compare this shift to the deconstruction of a smoothie. When you are making a healthy smoothie at home, the most popular ingredients are not only spinach and kale for green leafy vegetables, but also any sort of berry, bananas, and yogurt to make it not only healthy but tasty. When you start breaking these things down, yogurt and berries are still good, but not even as good as the vegetables. Have you tasted kale by itself, though? It's not necessarily my favorite food, unless I'm really in the mood for construction paper.

What's happened in my life is a deconstruction of this smoothie. I force myself to eat nothing but kale and spinach because that's what the "healthy" choice is. If it weren't for the berries, though, or the pizza or the french fries in our lives, we may not enjoy eating at all. In the same sense, I've removed "unproductive" things from my life, like watching movies, because they seem like an inefficient use of time. If I'm watching a movie, I'm not reading or practicing or exercising, so it must be a waste of quality time. But how am I supposed to enjoy LIVING if I'm not indulging in the berries and yogurt that makes the spinach palatable?

It's time to get selfish, take time to myself, watch movies, have an interesting conversation with a friend, or just read an article about sports. Either way, it's time to bring back the imagination that's been missing from my real world life.

One Awesome Thing: Music Release Days

It's been over 6 months since my last blog, so it's high time to pick up the habit again. There's so much attention given to satire, negativity, or passive mocking that it's hard for millennials, like myself, to find encouraging daily reads, so I'm hoping to get back into providing these One Awesome Thing posts on a regular basis again.

When I was in high school, I was introduced to the music "scene". To this point, my main source of quality music was The X (or The Force, if you remember that far back), which was the only modern alternative station in Pittsburgh and played a heavy dose of Green Day, Nirvana, and Pearl Jam. Throw in some Kid Rock and Limp Bizkit on MTV and you have me at 13.

My good friend, Brandon (who is now co-executive producer for Travel Channel's Dangerous Grounds, introduced me to music that was not on the radio in 10th grade (after establishing POD as my favorite band the year before). He gave me albums from MxPx, Value Pac, and Ninety Pound Wuss. These Tooth and Nail staples introduced me to wholesome Christian punk and, more importantly, the fact that there was great music that was NOT on the radio!

Over the next few years, learning about bands and listening to music became my main source of entertainment. When you are constantly entertained by what's new and hip, your favorite day becomes record release day. In high school and into college, Best Buy offered new release for 10 bucks, so this was where you'd find me on Tuesdays.

Well, times have changed. My love for new music still exists, but the Internet has changed everything. Albums started leaking online several years ago, so now bands put them online for us before the album release. More attention is given to having an album release show so fans can pay SOMETHING to see the artist instead of just listening for free online.

Today's One Awesome Thing is record release days, or, more specifically, Noah Gundersen's debut full-length album, Ledges, which is out today via Dualtone Records (The Lumineers, Delta Spirit). This album is beautiful. I've had the pleasure of seeing Noah play his own stuff 3 times since moving to Seattle, in some of the most unique settings (house show, Timber!, Triple Door) and look forward to seeing him a 4th time at the Neptune Theater for his release show this Saturday. I could go on and on about Noah Gundersen's unique songwriting ability, but I'll let my friend, Greg Jones, at Ear to the Ground do that instead.

Privilege

Yesterday I listened to an episode of This American Life from a week back called "The View From In Here". In Act One, we hear about the story of an inmate and corrections officer who had sat down together to share a real conversation for the first time. This was put together after the inmates watched a documentary called "The House I Live In", which talks about, among other things, how the war on drugs has perpetuated a vicious cycle of locking away drug offenders for relatively short stints that render them unable to earn an honest dollar because they are turned away from jobs and college grants due to their record.

Much like all of us, in a way, these offenders have to do whatever it takes to make a dollar. As a result of their situation, they choose selling drugs or theft to line their pockets. If I were them, I'd probably do the same thing.

There are a lot of things I could write about today, like most days. Last night my car was broken into for the third time since I moved to Tacoma. Like the first time, I did myself no favors by parking in an empty Foss High School parking lot instead of paying the measly five bucks for parking at Cheney Stadium for the Rainiers game. In my defense, crowds have been so thick for the only two other games I've been to that parking here seemed like a natural and popular choice. Regardless, this was not the case tonight and I ended up with a rock through my window and down a stereo face plate and iPod again.

Thanks in part to the comforting presence of Aly, I reacted more calmly than the last two times. There was not much I could do after the fact and knew this was an avoidable situation. If we'd have biked there or parked in the stadium lot I'd still have a passenger side window. If I'd have brought my valuables instead of leaving them in the glove compartment then I'd still have them. Nothing to do but clean up the mess and replace what I'd lost.

The One Awesome Thing today is that I can do that. I have the money and ability to replace my window, stereo, and iPod if I want to. I live in a house with a garage to keep my windowless car safe until the missing one is replaced.

Who knows what the story is of the man or woman who busted my window to earn themselves a hundred bucks for my old stuff. What I do know is that my story is different. It is one of privilege. I came from a family that raised me well and provided for me. I learned the value of a dollar and have done what it's taken to earn the dollars I have. I came from a family of resourcefulness, which has resulted in the privilege I've provided for myself to be able to afford a comfortable lifestyle. For this I am forever thankful to God for providing.

It's easy to get down on yourself or others when something awful like this happens. How often we forget how much God has blessed us in these times. Bad things happen to good people all the time, but we are quick to forget that good things happen to good and bad people all the same.

Let us thank God for the blessings He has provided today. The sins of my assailant and myself have been washed away with the blood of Christ. Neither of us deserve it, so we've already received far more than we shall ever need.

Stories

Too many things to mention from one of my best weekends in Washington. Timber! Outdoor Music Festival was this weekend, featuring an array of talent from the Pacific Northwest. There were some amazing folks I've seen a few times before like Ivan & Alyosha, Lemolo, and my favorite Seattle songwriter, Noah Gundersen, and some other great performers I hadn't seen before like Bryan John Appleby, Hobosexual, and Fruit Bats. The most pleasant of surprises was Vikesh Kapoor, who I expect to see more in the near future, including August 13 at Fremont Abbey.

I could honestly write a whole lengthy blog about this amazing weekend, but the One Awesome Thing I want to address today is people's stories. Listening to dynamic songwriters this weekend reminded me that there are plenty of stories to tell.

Everyone has grown up in a different place with unique parents and a variety of rituals and traditions. Listening to Noah Gundersen sing about Jesus, wondering what his thoughts are today, what they were a year ago, and what they will be in ten years is what makes music transcendent. I wonder who was "Easy to Love" for someone in Ivan & Alyosha or who's been off and on for Megan or Kendra from Lemolo.

Stories are what songs are composed of. Without the people living those stories, there would be no story to tell.

We all have our own story. Looking around Timber or the Mariners or Sounders games this weekend, I could only wonder what everyone's story was. Seeing wedding rings on some artists fingers and wondering if they'd told their wives they love them that day. Seeing college-age kids and wondering what other nonsense they'd get into this summer before classes start again. Wondering what brokenness might be temporarily mended by the words Eric D. Johnson or Bryan John Appleby.

This weekend, my story was of a celebration of life celebrated with people whom I care for in a time of my life I'm sure to look back on with thankfulness for the fullness I've experienced.

Spirit-Led Blogging

There were a lot of Awesome Things coming from our weekend in Portland visiting Tim and Lauren. A bagpiper riding a unicycle. A Hispanic folk band doing a photo shoot in the middle of a busy crosswalk. A stretch Geo Metro. If you've been to Portland, you know the list goes on.

But the One Awesome Thing came in my inbox last night. I've been writing this blog for 5 years this summer and it's never been about anything in particular; just random thoughts I've had about the world around me. I left one career (youth ministry) to pursue another (higher education management), which led me from home (Pittsburgh) to where I am today (Tacoma, WA). Despite the seemingly disconnected subject matter, one thing has been consistent; my faith in Jesus Christ.

Writing from the perspective of a twentysomething Christian has helped to engage in some conversations, but mostly with my friend, Meg. We worked together in high school, were friends outside of work for a while, and had lost touch until she started reading my blogs when they'd occasionally pop up. She contacted me to talk about being a twentysomething recovering from "church" (like many of us are), and the conversations have gone from there.

Meg recently made a Spirit-led decision with her life to relocate and wanted to share that with me. I couldn't be more thankful to know that the truths I've shared about who God is have resonated and helped Meg to explore and learn who God is on her own.

I often think about things to write about with the purpose of tooting the horn of my own opinions, but the Tim Keller sermon that Aly and I listened to in the car yesterday reminded us that the Gospel is about the blood of Christ and not our own interpretation, denomination, or philosophy. I'm thankful that I can look back at most of my writing and know that the Spirit and the blood of Christ have been in the marrow of my writing. When Meg reads anything that is good, she's reading the words of the Spirit written with my fingers. That's Awesome.

Sunrise, Sunset

I have not had much free time near a computer lately, so I apologize for slowing down with my One Awesome Thing series. Today's Thing was too good to continue putting off. Sorry, too, that I will be brief today.

This past weekend, we celebrated Aly's birthday with a belated trip to Vashon Island where her friend Kelsey's family owns a house. I could get into details about what we did (biking, sailing, catchphrasing) and how great it was, but I'm sticking to One thing here.

After a long day on Friday capped off with a few rounds of Catchphrase, we started to set up a Roku box to watch a little Netflix. Apparently something was watched, but I fell asleep almost instantly and ended up sleeping on the couch for the first 4 hours of my slumber. Around 4am, I awoke, considering whether to remain on the couch the rest of the night. It was cold and I had a sleeping bag and bed upstairs, so I arose to find this sight.

What beauty! The sun was off in the distance still and was shining some of its light toward Dead Man's Cove (it's not actually called that). I couldn't believe how amazing this sight was, so I snapped this picture.

After going back to sleep for a couple of hours upstairs, I rose to find what seemed to be a light that someone had turned on in our stairwell. I arose to investigate, only to find that the sunrise itself was what was causing this sight. See here.

I could go on and on about this beauty, but I'll let those pictures speak for themselves. In short, it is moments like these that remind me how blessed I am to live in Washington.

When Someone Else Makes Plans For You

I had started to write a couple different blogs yesterday then stopped. They weren't appropriate and were too prideful in nature, talking about things I like but with the context of things I don't like. That's not the point! This is!

We're going to Vashon Island tonight to belatedly celebrate Aly's birthday. Her best friend's family has a cabin on (near?) the Sound, so it sounds like it's going to be a great time.

One of my favorite parts of this excursion? I haven't made any of the plans! If you look at my desk, you might think I'm a pretty solid "P" on the MBTI, but I lean more into the "J" category simply because I like to make sure my ducks are all in a row before letting myself relax. That especially goes for making plans to do FUN things! I like to be in charge of what sort of fun is happening, where, and when, so I tend to insert myself into the planning role.

Not this time, though. I have very little idea what sort of entertainment even exists on Vashon, so I haven't bothered to so much as make a suggestion. I knew we'd have to get there via ferry and that we'd leave today and come back tomorrow, but nothing else. Tell me where to be and what to bring. It'll be a great time celebrating Aly!

Our lives can be lived this way every day. God has a plan, which means that any plan I make can just be thrown out the window, anyways. I constantly have to remind myself that I'm here for a reason. There are plenty of good things about living here (Aly, Michelle from the Club, this beautiful summer), so it's easy to remember why I'm so far from my familiar territory. I know that living in Pittsburgh or anywhere else would not be as ideal as I romanticize, so it's good to remember that and constantly think about the good things in my life.

God's plan may not always feel good, right, and perfect; but it is! All the time. Everywhere.

Vonnegut

I have only read a collection of short stories and 1.4 of Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.'s novels (Slaughterhouse-Five with Breakfast of Champions currently in the mix), but I love them all. His satirical approach to describing war and America is something I simply haven't experienced otherwise. We take ourselves very seriously here, which is why I'm not surprised by the friends of mine over time who have enjoyed Vonnegut's writing. It's cutting, witty, and matter-of-fact. Moreso, his cuts on American society in the 20th century carry truth; which is really the point of satire, isn't it?

I was going to list satire on its own as the One Awesome Thing today, but that goes against the point of this series. Satire is defined as "in which vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, ideally with the intent of shaming individuals, and society itself, into improvement." This pointing out of shortcomings would do the opposite of injecting positivity into our lives, such as the 21st century's most prominent satirists do in most cases (i.e. Jon Stewart, Seth MacFarlane, Trey Parker, and Matt Stone).

Vonnegut's satire, however, provokes thought. It calls to mind the things about American society that we can change in our day-to-day lives. Things like self-centeredness, inconsideration, and over-consumption are addressed with witty humor in a way that makes you laugh at yourself and think "is this really what someone would describe to someone who had never been to America?"

These sort of wake-up calls are necessary to get us going, but to also make light of some serious matters that could easily bring us down. There's a blurred line between negative and positive satire, but Vonnegut does a good job of erring on the positive, whether he intended to or not.

Competitive Sports

Anyone that knows me knows that my two favorite things are sports and music. Since moving to Tacoma from Pittsburgh, I've had the opportunity to play a LOT more music, but a LOT less sports. I won't complain much since the music half has been a great opportunity, but this weekend I finally got to catch a rhythm with my competitive side.

The One Awesome Thing from this weekend was competitive sports. I'd specify one, but there were a few examples to note. On Friday, a pair of co-workers and I played some basketball at lunchtime, which is great for the summer because we've got a nice dry outdoor court and a lighter schedule allowing for a little extra lunchtime bonding. We decided to make this a weekly game on Fridays and to try to move forward organizing a game against a team of students. Basketball has always been my favorite sport, so I'm excited to play more often.

Saturday and Sunday continued my pursuit of tennis with Aly. It was the second and third time we'd played, but we noticed a LOT of improvement! Aly's roommate, Andie, joined us on Saturday, which was great because the extra person could retrieve balls and get a break while the other two played. Aly still has my number as I haven't beaten her in a set yet. My day will come, though!

Finally, Sunday morning I got to put on a glove and do some fielding for the first time in a while. Some folks from church have put together a softball team for an adult league and had a practice on Sunday. I cannot play on the team because I'm not free on the nights they play, but it felt great to get out and run, catch, and hit for the first time in several years. I'm hoping to be able to play in future years because I love the excitement, strategy, and drama of softball/baseball. As effortless as professional players make it look, baseball is a game of constant movement and strategy. If someone is out of position for a relay throw or to cover a base, it could mean a run or a rally for the offense.

That's it for now! Thankfully I got to get some of my own competitive energy out as the Pirates blew a 3-game series with the Cubs this weekend.

4th of July

To cut right to the point, my mid-year resolution is similar to my new year's resolution; to be more positive. So, I'm starting now with a series of blogs that I hope carry on for a while. I want to write about one awesome thing I experience every day.

It's a day late, but yesterday's awesome thing was so rad that it needs to be shared!

Yesterday, I spent the day celebrating the 4th of July with friends. My roommate from college, Josh, moved to Seattle a few weeks ago, giving us a chance to spend time together for the first time in about 5 years. Josh moved here for a job at Amazon, so we spent the afternoon on the roof of their temporary apartment building overlooking Lake Union. The view and friends were great, but not quite the awesome thing I was talking about.

Next, I went to Bellevue to spend time with my favorite gal, Aly, and some of her friends. We went to the Bellevue Family Fourth, had some free food courtesy of Aly's friend, Augusta, who was working the event, and enjoyed a cover band (no seriously, it was enjoyable). That was nice, but not the best part.

The best part was this; Aly and I left around 9:45; a bit before the fireworks were starting. We hit I-5 south en route to Tacoma in good time with basically no traffic. Again, pretty cool, but not awesome. The awesome part was the fireworks. After we started driving a few minutes, we caught a few glimpses of fireworks; pretty natural given the occasion. As we kept driving, though, we kept seeing fireworks. Right in front of us, too! The WHOLE way down I-5, nonetheless! We caught fireworks being shot off from every town all the way down to Tacoma. Somehow, our timing to get home early enough to wake up for work the next day gave us the opportunity to see fireworks all the way home completely unplanned. What an awesome way to finish a brilliant day off.

Society, Have Mercy on Me

Being honest and open has always been a trait of mine. Maybe honesty and openness is a nice way of saying I don't think before I speak, but I'm okay with that. It really is part of who I am. I think ahead enough to not get myself in loads of trouble, so I'll keep going with what has worked so far.

Anxiety has been a theme in my life lately, but not for reasons you'd generally expect. Some of the top causes of anxiety (work-related stress, financial struggles, relationships) are not of too much trouble for me these days thanks to great friends, a great job, and a great girlfriend. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty happy!

Instead, my anxiety can be linked directly to simply learning how to be an adult in today's society.

When I first arrived in Tacoma, I wanted to get busy and fast. I had not lacked community to that degree in my life and was certainly not used to free nights with no one to call and nothing to do. Without getting into many details, I've certainly filled that time. Between two band practices a week, time spent with Aly, and evenings dedicated to friends from church, I have little free time left (especially when compared to the last chapter of my life in Pittsburgh which was 4 months of funemployment).

With summer has come busy weekends full of fun activities, but still not enough time to do the things I need to do to keep anxiety off my doorstep; mainly relaxation that comes from seclusion.

When my friend, Andy, suggested wanting to leave Nashville to move to a smaller city like Asheville, NC, or Santa Fe, NM, I didn't believe him or think he'd actually do it because, like me, he craves community, energy, and activity. The more I think about it, the more I realize how nice it might be to actually live in a place with less people, less opinions, and less of society. Places like Nashville and Seattle can be overwhelming with the desire for people to share their opinions (myself, the blogger, included, for goodness sake).

This coffee is better than that coffee because of this flavor that you and I have different opinions about.

This band is better than that band because of this objective opinion I have about what makes a band good.

This beer is better than that beer because that brewery is trying too hard or is available in too many places.

In short, society is wearing me down. I care too much about what other people think, which is a problem most of us have in this what-are-you-listening-to-on-Spotify world we inhabit. I wear the same jeans and shirt every day; lay off!

What I'm learning is that instead of craving the action of the city, maybe all I want is a porch, a cheap beer, and a Buccos game on the radio. That life that Christopher McCandless was pursuing in Into the Wild becomes enviable from time-to-time. I doubt I'll be lighting my car or money on fire any time soon, but there's something to be said for keeping a few important people close and the less-important people at an arm's length.

I don't expect any On the Road sort of experiences any time soon, but a day trip to Portland should help and  also the thought that if I want my next job to eventually be in Seattle or Missoula, MT, those options both exist. Right now, I'm leaning towards Montana.

(Sports) Seasonal Homesickness

For context, you need to know just a few simple things about me. First, I grew up outside the city of Pittsburgh and, therefore, bleed black and gold. Second, I moved to Tacoma, WA, 20 months ago in September 2011. I've experienced a good bit of homesickness from time-to-time which grows and fades and has been less severe each time it creeps around. Lately, for you statistics nerds, I've realized a positive and direct correlation that explains the cyclical nature of my homesickness. I'll call it SSH, or, Sports Seasonal Homesickness.

This concept may make sense to some and make no sense to others. If you're a sports fan, you know what I'm talking about. I mean a REAL sports fan. One that reads articles in your local paper after games, follows your team's beat writers on Twitter, and watches every game you're capable of watching. Folks from cities like Chicago, Philadelphia, or Boston might know a lot about what I'm talking about.

I have gotten to the point where I can predict when my depression will set in each year. Late December through early February, most of March through early April, early May through early June, and mid-September, or, NFL playoffs, March Madness, MLB Opening Day, NHL playoffs, and the start of NFL/NCAA football season. Thankfully (kinda), the Pirates have never given me much to care about aside from the start of the season, so October is sorta safe.

There's no way around it. It's a simple formula that I am 2500 miles away from the center of my sports fandom. People in the northwest simply don't care about sports as much as the east coast or midwest and that's okay. It stinks, but it's okay. It makes it hard for me to really get into the teams I've followed forever because I don't have as many folks to talk to about the Penguins, Pirates, or Steelers. They like other things and that's cool. I don't love hiking (yet) or dogs (ever) or climbing stuff (dangerous), but I knew that was the culture coming into this chapter of my life. 

The homesickness doesn't come from the teams as much as you'd think, although I do love a good walk down memory lane with Soixante-Six. No, it's the memories tied to them that really hit me. 

With the Penguins, the memories are abundant. Walking into Police Station Pizza on Friday nights with my dad to see the Pens game on a 19-inch color TV sitting on top of the Coca-Cola fridge for the cooks to watch. Recording portions of TV or radio broadcasts on cassette tapes so I can listen again the next day while mom carted me around running errands. Creating our own wooden shooter-tutor for my hockey net so I could re-enact games from the night before. As an adult, creating lifelong friendships over games at the Otto or Redfield residences, remembering that we don't talk during play unless it's to instruct ("PINCH!"). Vowing never to eat Mrs. Malkin's red borscht without beets again because it jinxed a Stanley Cup game against the Red Wings. Drinking nothing but Pabst Blue Ribbon during Game 7 of the Stanley Cup because that was my good luck charm.

For the Pirates, so many memories of trips to see the worst team in baseball for about 40% of my joyrides in my first 2 years of driving. Joking about the oft-forgotten pieces to the longest seasonal losing streak in pro sports history (20 years), such as Jermaine Allensworth, Francisco Cordova, or, my personal favorite, Rob Mackowiak. Playing wiffleball in my backyard with my closest friends picking different eras of Pirates teams to be (with 1992, of course, being the most popular). Spending most summer evenings with the game on the radio or the TV for the last 20 (losing) seasons.

The Steelers are the biggest unifier. My mother does not watch sports, but she surely knows if the Steelers won or lost each week thanks to the mood of my father. Watching games with my dad at Grandma's house. Watching playoff games with friends in high school and putting our jerseys over our faces for each field goal attempt. Yelling obscenities at Ike Taylor. The list goes on.

It doesn't stop there, either. Pitt sports have been a staple in my life the whole time, as well. Going to games at old Pitt stadium after I'd go play video games or mess around with AutoCAD while dad worked overtime at his engineering job. Choosing games against crappy teams like Rutgers or Temple because we knew there'd be tickets available and Pitt might actually win. Shooting hoops in our driveway with my friends to let off steam after Pitt would lose tough games. The good years in the early 2000s when the unthinkable happened and bowl games and March Madness became staples year-in and year-out. Tyler Palko. Larry Fitzgerald. The list goes on again. (re: It's Tough Being a Pitt Fan).

Needless to say, these memories and feelings creep up when each season reaches their pivotal points. I've spent the last 2 years searching for anywhere to watch games at bars or online. Subscribing to MLB.TV because I couldn't imagine a summer without Pirates baseball. Finding a Steelers bar where I could watch games with people who aren't still bitter about a pathetic Super Bowl with the local team. Finally moving into a house (with Canadians, no less) that has cable where I can watch the Penguins. These are necessary evils to maintain sanity in these times of depression.

There's really no way to alleviate this depression. It's something I'll have to live with forever. WebMD says there's no cure aside from moving home, which I don't have any plans to do any time soon. God says I can't go back yet. Thomas Wolfe says you can't go home again, but I don't trust him any further than I can throw him (which probably isn't far because dead bodies are heavy, I hear).

So, every once in a while I'm going to be sad. I'm going to miss entire Saturdays and Sundays spent on the Redfields' couch watching games. I'll miss the assumed case of Yuengling sitting in Jordan's fridge when the Pirates are on 90% of summer nights. I'll miss the no-nonsense attitude of Pittsburgh sports fans and their hate of everything Philadelphia. Until the Lord calls me home (Pittsburgh, not heaven, although they may not be mutually exclusive), I will do whatever it takes to create a pocket of my life for the black and gold (or blue and gold) to give my sanity some relief every January, March, June, September, and each month in between.

It's not just sports. It's the only life I've known.

Let's go Pens.

Let's go Bucs.

Here we go Steelers.

Hail to Pitt.

Being Who We Were Created To Be

I'm not going to lie, friends. Life has been a struggle the last month or so. I'm at a constant internal conflict over so many things and rarely feel like I get a chance to let it all hang out. There was a time in my life when I was an open book; saying the things I thought without much restraint and doing whatever felt right at the time without much thought. Following my emotions got me into some good situations (packing my car and moving to Washington) and into some difficult situations (packing my car and moving to Washington).

To be frank, I've lost my edge and kept my mouth shut far too much as I've settled into the passive Washington state of mind and it's driving me nuts. I haven't verbally processed things much because I am so tired at the end of the day that I don't want to talk about anything of significance with anyone. Besides, how am I supposed to tell my community that I feel like I'm lacking community or my girlfriend from Washington about the things I don't like about Washington without feeling like some judgmental self-righteous know-it-all prick? I don't know. Maybe there's no way.

Here's the thing, though: these things are true. I miss the community I had in Pittsburgh (where I spent the first 26 years of my life, of course) and there are plenty of things that annoy me about Washington (balanced with cool things like the current immaculate weather and general presence of bodies of water).

I've been a verbal processor all my life and need to embrace who I am. I talk when I think. I have opinions and like to share them. Sometimes I'm right and sometimes I'm wrong. It's who I've been made to be.

When I first moved here, the first thing I made sure people knew about me is that I'm from Pittsburgh. I bleed black and gold and always will. It probably annoyed people how much I talked about Pittsburgh; what life was like there, how we did things, how great the Steelers/Pirates/Penguins are. I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not. It's who I am and always will be.

A few months ago, a friend of mine pointed out something incredibly significant in my life. We were talking about how people in Biblical times worshiped idols, how we still do that today, and how those idols tend to be our identity instead of Jesus. When talking about what it was that we identified with instead of Jesus, I jokingly/seriously said Pittsburgh. My friend Ashley pointed out a few weeks later in another conversation that Pittsburgh definitely is an idol for me. 

It's the gold standard of what a place could be in my eyes. The ethnic communities founded by Italians, Germans, Irish, etc. The unified black and gold colors of every team. The healthy balance of a low cost of living with a big city arts scene. The way that small ideas like the Saxifrage School (which I spent a few months helping to plan) can get big-time recognition in the Wall Street Journal (as well as the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette; recognize the skyline in that Death Cab shirt on the left?). 

I've kept my eyes on Pittsburgh instead of Jesus when choosing how to do anything in my life. Instead of focusing on the community around me in Tacoma, I'd always think about the community in Pittsburgh that I left behind. 

For the last few months since that conversation, I've shifted. I've been living more in the world around me and investing in the community I have here. Here's the problem, though: Pittsburgh is still and always will be who I am. The decisions I make, the way I see the world, how I interact with people; it's all Pittsburgh. No matter where I am, I'll always be a yinzer. I'll always want to watch a Steelers game instead of going to church. I'll always pine for Yuengling no matter what amazing craft beers are nearby. I will always seek hard-nosed, genuine people and music who don't give a shit about holding back who they are for any reason.

I've been slipping slowly into the lukewarm passivity of the northwest as a result of not being true to myself. While I don't find any fault or problem in addressing the fact that Pittsburgh has been an idol of mine, I'm learning that it's also important to not remove it from my identity. I owe it to the city that raised me.

So what does this mean for my life and the Kingdom of God? Hopefully it means going back to being a genuine, outspoken, community-focused individual. When I lived in Pittsburgh, I was always the person rallying people together for parties and gatherings. While I don't have a killer back deck for these gatherings anymore, that doesn't mean I can't still be a party-starter. Bringing people together has always been a gift of mine and I'm doing the Kingdom a disservice by keeping to myself.

It means going back to being the dry, witty, sarcastic individual who's hard to read if you're not familiar with me. I'd be sorry for being this way, but I'm not sorry. I used to make people laugh. Sometimes at other people's or my own expense. Worrying so much about my own image or the over-sensitivity of others has never been much of a concern until I moved here, so it's time to go back to my old ways. It's who I was made to be.

Friends

That smile that overcomes your face when you see someone you know in a place you don't expect. It's such a simple thing, but we all experience it. I just watched a friend find a friend in a local coffeeshop and, whether it was expected or not, it seemed like such a pleasant encounter, no matter how simple. We inherently want and need human interaction. Friends. Love. Happiness. They all go together.

New Year's Resolution: More Love

Pittsburgh gets my gears turning, so it's time for a post.

I don't traditionally make new year's resolutions, but it's time for a change for the better. There are a lot of negative influences in the world these days. Every time I log in to my Twitter I come across some of the most negative posts speaking poorly, satirically, or sarcastically about basically anything. I've absolutely joined in the party, trying to be amusing or entertaining for all of the wrong reasons. The election, musicians, the towns I'm in, the people I'm around; there are plenty of flaws to point out.

Rather than pointing out that even we who are writing have flaws, let's focus on the good instead. Social media is full of examples of people's mistakes, shortcomings, and flaws, but don't we like to hear the pros more than the cons? Isn't it much more uplifting to hear a kind word? Don't we feel warm and happy when people are warm and happy?

So that's it; it's simple. Less complaining. Less poking fun at others. Less negativity. More love. My time in Tacoma hasn't been the most pleasant of my life, but it has more to do with the person experiencing it than I give credit. I can't force myself to like a place, but I sure can love it like Jesus loves us.

Why Chastity is Easy

Although not entirely easy, chastity has been something I've taken simple and practical steps toward attaining. I recently wrote a guest post for my friend Arleen's love and relationships series, which can be found here:

http://www.arleenspenceley.com/2012/12/guest-post-why-chastity-is-easy.html